When you get married, you must depend on your family circumstances.
When you get married, you must depend on your family circumstances.
Marriage is the happiness of two people, not the grievance of one.

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-01-

when you get married, you must talk about money

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late the night before last, the backstage received a private message from the reader:

Uncle, I regret it so much. I really want to get divorced. I was too young when I got married. I only cared about love and love. I didn't even care about the money for the house and the bride price. I didn't expect that all that was left was sadness.

after listening to the reader Lily's story, I can't help feeling sorry.

Lily and her husband met in college, fell in love for four years, and naturally prepared to get married after graduation.

unexpectedly, the two of them were so upset because of the money for the house and the prize money that they almost broke up.

Lily and her husband agreed that each side would make a down payment on half of the marriage room, and the two would repay the money together after marriage.

on the grounds that it is not cost-effective to make a fixed deposit, the parents of the man asked Lily's family to make a down payment in advance and promised that the money would be repaid by the husband's family alone after marriage.

Lily's parents disagreed, and Lily was so embarrassed that she hid in her room and cried every day. Looking at the red-eyed daughter, the old couple had to relax.

one wave just flattened, one wave after another.

according to local custom, the man should give 100000 bride price, but a month before marriage, the man's parents suddenly changed their tune and wanted to cut the bride price in half, leaving the other half to her husband's brother.

Lily's parents are very angry at the man's family's behavior of going back on his word.

"I'll give you a bargain now, and there will be a good life in the future? I really can 't. it doesn't matter whether we get married or not. "

Lily, who was carried away by love, felt that I loved this person, not his money, and that betrothal money would be a formality.

so in front of her parents, she pleaded for mercy and put in a good word for her old family.

after marriage, Lily slowly realized that the tears after marriage were all water in her head before marriage.

she asked her husband for the money to repay the mortgage. At first, her husband was just procrastinating on the date of payment, but he became more and more impatient. She often disliked her for spending too much money and didn't know how to be diligent and frugal in running the family.

her mother-in-law looked down on her even more, never helping her with housework or taking care of her children, and said behind her back that she was spending her son's money, and that she was simply a "vampire".

when you are in love, you feel that talking about money hurts your feelings; only after marriage do you know that it hurts your heart not to talk about money.

it is said that it is vulgar to talk about money, but only when you talk about money, your life will not come to a dead end.

firewood, rice, oil, salt sauce, vinegar tea, having children, visiting relatives and friends, and good health, which one does not need to talk about money?

when two people are together, fall in love, but do not talk about money, the loving couple will eventually become devastated and can only be strangers in the end.

-02-

when you get married, be sure to see your parents

colleague Chuchu decisively broke up with Gao Fu's handsome boyfriend last week. Everything is attributed to the way the boy's parents get along.

that day, Chuchu went to visit her boyfriend's parents and found that her boyfriend's mother was busy in the kitchen, while his boyfriend and his father were leisurely watching the game like a shopkeeper.

at the dinner table, his father scolded his mother while eating, complaining that the food was salty and disdaining that the cooking was not soft enough.

he clearly looks embarrassed, but his boyfriend is indifferent and seems to be used to it.

after the meal, his mother cut several plates of fruit, and as soon as he put it on the table, his father began to shout, "what was the deal for you to buy cherries?"

his mother smiled and explained, "the cherries in the fruit store downstairs are not very fresh, so I bought oranges, apples and grapes."

his father didn't buy it at all, blowing his beard and glaring: "you are so stupid, you don't know how to run away and buy it in the supermarket?"

looking at these scenes, I clearly saw what I looked like after marriage.

if a husband always turns a blind eye to his wife's efforts, then children will gradually become parents under the influence of osmosis.

all consequences must have their causes. The brand of the original family will affect a person's life.

parents' mode of getting along with each other affects their children's way of life

parents' way of making money affects their children's attitude towards money.

parents' behavior affects their children's values of character.

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when talking about marriage, be sure to look at each other's parents more often. Because you not only married a person, but also married a family.

some people say that parents' marriage is the continuation of children's marriage. I think so.

Children with loving parents tend to know better how to love, better manage their marriages, and lead a peaceful and beautiful life.

on the contrary, if parents always resent and curse each other, their children will become increasingly afraid of marriage, even continuing the tragedies of the previous generation.

-03-

when you get married, you should pay attention to the right couple

"Qifa Shuo" has a debate entitled "should marriage care about the right family?" Cai Kangyong replied that he had done his best:

"the couples I remember include their own educational class, cultural background, and so on.

with different families and social circles, there will be less and less topics to exchange with each other after marriage, which will lead couples to go farther and farther away. "

indeed, two people who have nothing in common will be very tired to get along with each other. They are like two intersecting lines, even if they have met briefly, they will eventually go their separate ways.Farther away.

everyone must have seen the well-known sitcom "A Family with Children".

Xia Donghai, a middle-aged man, loves life, cares about his wife and takes care of his children. He likes to work quietly in a comfortable home.

in Xia Donghai's mind, home is the most important part. His career is based on his family.

Xia Donghai's ex-wife, Mary, is different. She is a career-minded woman. Her life is filled with jobs, clients and money, leaving little to her husband and children.

over time, Xia Donghai disliked Mary for not taking care of her family, while Mary disliked Xia Donghai for not striving for progress.

they shared a different bed and talked to each other, so they had to put an end to the marriage that tortured each other.

the reason is that I like a comfortable environment, and you like to wander around. And it can't be changed.

later, Xia Donghai met Liu Mei, and two people who were equally family-oriented got together and reformed a family.

because the three values are the same, although their days are "chicken flying and dog jumping", they are also happy and warm.

in fact, the so-called convergence of the three values does not require that your interests, means of doing things, and way of thinking are exactly the same, but that you can seek common ground while reserving differences and understand and appreciate each other.

if you like reading, he says you are hypocritical;

you want to have a big meal once in a while, but he dislikes you for wasting money;

if you want to make your life interesting and refined, but he comments and complains that you can't live, stop the loss as soon as possible and leave in time.

Marriage should be the happiness of two people, not the grievance of one.

May you open your eyes, find someone worth spending time with, and experience the true meaning of happiness in pots and pans.

May you not be afraid to talk about money, meet the person who grows up hand in hand, and never give up in spite of ups and downs.

May your porridge and meal be warm and sweet day and night.

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